Just exactly how old do I think am....

So can anyone explain to me why at 41 years old I have decided to get in the best shape of my life??? I am down 31 pounds and 4 pants sizes!!! Isn't that good enough? Apparently not. Now my goal is to make everything firmer and possibly lose another 10 pounds. My quest for this new goal has led me to TRX class. A sick, twisted form of exercise where you use your natural body weight while hanging from straps as resistance. Oh my gosh, this class kicked my butt. I have cramps in places that I didn't know that you could cramp. But if I can get strong like Heather (instructor) then it will all be worth it. It will won't it??? The only that stinks is that class doesnt end until 9:15, which means that by the time I get home and shower, it is 10 pm. Who wants to eat dinner that late at night, ME. But I didn't, glass of milk and a protein bar is my dinner tonight. It doesn't help that I am watching Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives right now. Damn that Guy Fieri! He is just making me even more hungry. Maybe I am too old for this crap and I should quit while I am ahead....Oh yeah, did I mention that the husband is baking cookies at 10:45 pm! I really believe that he is a closet chubby chaser, he knows that cookies are my crack! It is going to be a long night....pray for me.

Ready for The Betty....

I am so ashamed to say that the cliche of getting drunk while on a business trip is alive and well! Hmmm...I just got back from spending the past 5 days in Las Vegas for a major national tradeshow. Crazy! 5 days is too long in Vegas...at certain point between dinner and cocktails you begin to actually feel your liver pickle. I can't remember the last time I drank so much, consistenly for multiple days in a row!! On the plus side, with age has come a freakish tolerance, that allows me to drink ALOT. And for those of you who remember the curb incident of 2008, there was no repeat accident.

Being "stuck" with co-workers for 5 days is a little weird. Your relationships start to take on a different dynamic, in other words sometime you learn more about people than you wanted to. On the other hand sometimes you are pleasantly surprised by the things you learn. Alcohol can spark deep introspection and lead people share stories of life, love and disappointment. What is weird is that all of the shared experiences/lessons you discussed the previous night are never talked about in the light of day. I guess it is one of those what is discussed in the bar, stays in the bar....Strange bedfellows in deed.

While I enjoy my co-workers, most are really good people, I do not know that I would willingly spend 5 straight days with them if I were home leading my normal life. Yet in Las Vegas, they were my best friends, unable/unwilling to make a move without them. We were like an old gang, a demented version of the Sharks or Jets from West Side Story and it didn't help that we were all wearing the same company jacket everywhere we went!! Thanks Becky! Oh yes there was dancing, but nothing Jerome Robbins or Bob Fosse would be proud of. There were definitely some embarrassing moments, but all in all it was a good trip, but I don't know if I will be making eye contact with certain people for a while and I am still not sure how much work was accomplished. I am jsut glad to be home. Being away makes you appreciate what's waiting for you at home.

2010 - New Year

Happy New Year! 2010, another year the beginning of another decade. Or is it? They are still debating it, so who actually knows. So this is the time of the year when you take stock of your life, make changes, committments to do better, be better. So I am curious, how did I do....my number one resolution is always to lose weight. So far I have lost 30 pounds, give or take the day. Sometimes it's 30, other days it's 27 other days it's 32. But no matter what, I finally have put myself on the road to weight loss. Still need another 10 pounds gone and then I can concentrate on firming everything up. My goal is to wear shorts this summer and not feel self-conscious. I think that is an attainable goal. Everything else, all of the other goals, kinds of a wash. No better, no worse than last year so I guess that is good in some respect.

My focus for 2010 is learning how to relax and be present. I spend so much time worrying about the next thing, that I never really enjoy the moment. I am going to work really hard at this, because with a small child all of the fun happens in the here and now. If I am constantly worrying about tomorrow I am going to miss all of the really cool things that Ben does and is! The other thing is I have to let go of my desire to be the "good/fun" parent. I let Mike play the heavy role too often. I have to make sure that I am reinforcing all of the lessons/discipline that Mike is trying to instill. Besides that, I want to recommit to my faith and making it a priority as well as realy focusing on my family and those who love me. I am going to try and let go of all the pettiness that has been a focal point of my life for so long. Big goals...i don't know if all of this is attainable, but if I am on path working towards them then that is progress.